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My Moral Compass is Broken



Well I’ve officially been waiting tables for about 2 months now. And with that glorious addition to my worklife has come a few things: a fun, sexy pair of orthopedic shoes, a newfound penchant for tamales and a complete skewing of my morals.

Allow me to elaborate.


When you work in a restaurant, your senses become dulled to certain things. For instance, you stop holding your mouth open in shock when you find out people at work sleep together. You also aren’t shocked and awed that most of the staff dabbles in drug and alcohol abuse. Or that you understand curse words and foul slang you previously didn’t know existed. Or maybe all of those are just me.


Regardless, your senses also become heightened to what I refer to as “waiter injustices” such as 10% tipping, people asking to switch tables or when people let their kids run around the restaurant like its freaking Gymbouree.


I realized I was officially walking the line between total loss of moral logic when the below events happened and my reactions were the total opposite of what they normally wouldve been:


  • 1. I walked in on a few co-workers doing “blow” at our Manager’s going away party and just turned and walked out….fazed but not that surprised. (two month ago reaction wouldve been gasping loudly and then fainting)
  • 2. A 16-top was seated in the section next to mine when 4 of the teenagers from that table picked up their plates and sat at one of my tables. Which, of course, meant less money for me. We informed them that if they needed more room we could add a table in to their party but they said “No, this is fine”. As though that had been one of the options. I was outraged and found myself talking about it to at least 3 people before i realized that it was not the end of the world and i would, in fact, survive.
  • 3. Towards the end of the night on Tuesday I was walking in the back room to get the pepper shakers for end of the night cleaning stuff. I saw a pen on the table and without blinking, grabbed it and whispered “MINE”. (two months ago I would never have considered a click pen to be a prize worth scoring)


Help! I’m a good person, get me outta here,



Listening to: Paper Route. AKA my favorite new band. LISTEN to them. Also, chicago peeps theyre comin in concert this summer!


On my mind: This new gigantic Whole Foods is starting to scare me. 3rd largest in the world?!

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Mlongo permalink
    06-13-09 10:24 am

    initially when i went to look for paper route i was googling “paperboy” and had a hunkering to listen to the ditty. now that that’s over, I’m elated at finding that paper route’s influences are: jurassic park, magic tricks, alice in wonderland and the titanic soundtrack

    ME TOO!

  2. 06-16-09 2:33 pm

    What’s a 16-top?

  3. Chris permalink
    11-27-09 11:09 pm

    I believe that rushbomb is talking about the fact that most restaurants require that a group over 16 people at a table needs to give a larger tip then usually, I believe 20 or 25 percent. When they began splitting up into various tables, she would get less tips then.

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